Oh my, I just got more confused. It’s just when everything is going well, everything is doing good then suddenly it just got more complicated. What am I saying here? The truth is I don’t know either. These were the exact words that cam out from someone, “I want to pursue a relationship, there’s this girl…” oh my! Just when everything in my life is starting to be better for good and then all of a sudden this? I just don’t know what to really see. I wanted to know what it really is, I just don’t know how. I want to have a better, no, perfect life, but not so perfect reflecting in me, everything was just falling into place, and then this? Do you ever felt like you wanted to know everything and wish that you wouldn’t miss anything out? Ever felt like thousands of waves are crashing on you and you just can’t fight it off? I mean, I don’t even know anything about the thing that I wanted to now about, I can’t even fight it or fight for it or even fight it off, as I must say. But I just wanted to be complete, I wanted to feel complete. But I don’t want to think that I can be complete, besides having God in my life is, to think that I can be completed or I can feel complete by someone else, and take note “someone else”. I just wanted to hug this person and stay like that for even a few minutes. The passion of my heart just burning flames, I mean that’s how I feel, explaining metaphorically speaking just to give you an example. I know that at some point it’s not right for me to feel this way, but I just can’t help it. And it kept me safe. Thinking of it, me myself I wanted to pursue that someone, but now isn’t just the right time. I just wanted to be with this person again and just enjoy everything, the company. It kept me thinking, what if this could work what if God can or would allow it, would I still grab it or finally make a decision to walk away from it? Oh! How I just hate the way that I think of things especially when I see reality. Pursuing someone, what does that really mean? And I mean the real meaning when you apply it to someone’s life. Pursuing someone.. hmmm.. I guess it’s about going after a thing that is walking away from you, or maybe asking something about a serious matter in a serious way. Maybe it’s like you want something that you’re hesitant if you can have it or even if it wants you back. I mean in a romantic way, pursuing someone is you’re like sure about the things that you’re gonna do with this person, it’s like having something that you want more than anything.
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